The film begins with a stampede. Tens of thousands of screaming teenage girls — 10 points to anyone who can spot a parent in that crowd — fight their way into a packed stadium to catch a glimpse of their idol, pop superstar Hannah Montana (Miley Cyrus). They love her music, they emulate her style, yet they have no idea she’s secretly Miley Stewart, a regular girl just like every one of them.

There’s much to consider when attempting to spin a successful television show into box-office gold, but Disney has developed a solid blueprint for the process. Its latest jumper, “Hannah Montana: The Movie,” neatly follows in the footsteps of 2005’s “The Lizzie McGuire Movie” as its main character is plucked from her comfort zone, swept off her feet by a disconnected love interest and inevitably taught something about herself that she kind of already knew the whole time.

In the film, Miley has been balancing her two personalities responsibly for more than three years, but when Hannah’s crazy lifestyle gets the best of her — she ruins her best friend Lilly Truscott’s (Emily Osment) birthday party and gets into a public brawl with Tyra Banks over a pair of shoes — her dad, Robbie Ray (Billy Ray Cyrus), steps in to set his little girl straight. He reroutes her private jet from New York to rural Tennessee, where Miley encounters her old home, Crowley Corners; her old horse, Blue Jeans; and her childhood flame, Travis Brody (Lucas Till).

Her forced journey of self-discovery isn’t the film’s only source of conflict. While Miley and Travis fall in love through a series of awkwardly written interactions and ridiculous montages, famed gossip reporter Oswald Granger (Peter Gunn) makes his way to Tennessee to dig up some dirt on the most popular teenage girl in the world.

The family-friendly comedy is grounded in physical humor. Robbie Ray struggles to catch falling dinner plates, stubborn chickens refuse to give up their eggs and Miley gets so overwhelmed with her problems that she breaks down into tears. OK, that last one may just be unintentionally hilarious.

“Hannah Montana: The Movie” doesn’t set out to convert new fans but rather to preach to its already faithful tween choir. Nowhere is that more evident than the film’s soundtrack, which is mostly made up of Hannah Montana original songs. With the song “Hoedown Throwdown,” which Miley performs at a barn party, she lays out step-by-step instructions of the accompanying dance, which Disney clearly hopes will become a craze of its own. The problem is that there are nearly 20 steps to the routine, making it more confusing than “the Macarena” and even more obnoxious than the “Soulja Boy” dance. Don’t expect that one to catch fire too quickly.

The film’s other major flaw is its mixed message. Viewers are supposed to believe they’re getting an inspirational lesson about the importance of being true to oneself. “She has the best of both worlds,” the film’s tagline reads. “Now she has to pick just one.” That’s good in theory, but at no point during the film is Miley ever actually forced to abandon one of her lives. She attempts to come clean on a whim but is literally told by a crowd of strangers to put her wig back on and keep singing. The convoluted message will likely be lost on the film’s unshakable fan base.

Despite moments of obnoxiousness or moral ambiguity, it’s important to take “Hannah Montana: The Movie” for exactly what it is: a shallow, sugary, family-oriented romp. Longtime fans of the franchise will love the film for all the same reasons that devoted haters will choose to find disdain.

“Hannah Montana: The Movie” was written by Richard Correll, Barry O’Brien and Michael Poryes, and directed by Daniel Berendsen.