‘Girl, Positive.’ Reviews, negative.
Lifetime is airing its newest — and one of its most ridiculous — TV movies tonight at 8 p.m. “Girl, Positive” is the story of a high-school girl named Rachel (played by Andrea Bowen from “Desperate Housewives”) who finds out that she has contracted HIV after sleeping with a football player named Jason (played by Erik “where the f has he been” Von Detton). Oh, and she finds out about this after Jason dies in a car crash.
But wait! The soap opera isn’t over. Rachel is eased through the process by a substitute teacher (played by Jennie Garth…) who ALSO has HIV. This movie sounds like “Outbreak” … except, without all the adorable, flesh-eating monkeys.
I’ve only watched one other “special topic” Lifetime movie in my life, and it was “Cyber Seduction,” the story of a teenager who gets so addicted to internet porn that he tries to commit suicide. God, I hope this is just as ridiculous.
Cross Rosie off the list
According to Fox News, CBS officially offered the hosting gig on “The Price Is Right” to Rosie O’Donnell … and she turned it down! Apparently, she wasn’t willing to move to LA in order to tape the show. She’s happy where she is in New York.
Finally, some good news. As much as I love Rosie, I love “The Price Is Right” even more. Just consider me its over-protective momma bird. And Rosie…you come near my eggs again, I’ll peck you in the face.
Spider-Man gets an iffy makeover
Riding the coat tails of the “Spider-Man” blockbuster trilogy is a new Spidey cartoon series on Kids WB titled “The Spectacular Spider-Man.” And, as much as I’m always interested to see how new version interpret an old favorite, I have my doubts about how long this one will last (let’s not forget, this is the tenth “Spider-Man” cartoon series, most of which had little staying power).
They’ve given Spider-Man that same skinny, Tim Burton-y look they gave to Batman in “The Batman” and Superman in “Legion of Super Heroes.” Still, I have to admit I have a soft spot for “The Batman.” So if this new show is anything like that, I wouldn’t mind checking it out.
Obviously it could never compare to the awesomeness of “Spider-Man: The Animated Series” (anyone who grew up in the 90s knows exactly what I’m talking about) but chances are it will at least be better than MTV’s “Spider-Man: The New Animated Series.” God, that one was awful.
“The Spectacular Spider-Man” will begin airing in early 2008.
‘Dramatic Chipmunk’ spawns YouTube movement
I still say the original is always the best, but that isn’t stopping legions of YouTube-ers from editing the beloved “Dramatic Chipmunk” video.
“Director’s Cut” — What happens when the cameras stop rolling?
“Bombay Chipmunk” — Okay, I’ll be honest. I don’t really get this one. So it probably has something to do with World War II. I don’t know nothin about World War II.
“Caught In The Act” — Leave the little guy alone. He just wants to relieve some stress.
And last (and certainly least) “Chipmunk Drama Remix” — Lose yourself in the pulsating beats of the Hamster Dance.
Believe me, there are so many more out there. But they just keep getting worse.
Prepare yourselves for Muppet overload
Kermit’s lifeless body is being dragged out of the Jim Henson attic, ready to be re-introduced to a generation of kids that have basically grown up Muppet-less for most of their lives. A series of mini-movies featuring the Muppets and some Disney Channel stars — my money is on those squirrely little girls boys from “The Suite Life” — will be shown on the Disney Channel beginning in August.
And in slightly more fantastic/bizarre Muppet news, the good people at TV Squad brought my attention to a Muppet TV series that I didn’t know about — mostly because it looks like it’s not happening. The would-be-show titled “Tinseltown” was going to be about two gay Muppets (Samson the bull and Bobby the pig) who adopted a twelve-year-old human child. Those Muppets. So freaking progressive.
Now throw your hands in the air and do the Kermit.
Diet Mountain Dew leads to adorable chainsaw death
This one’s not quite as adorable as the flying hamster commercial I posted a few days ago … then again, that one didn’t involve people being chased down by a psycho wielding a chainsaw. Gaah, I won’t ruin it for you. Just watch.
Thanks, Jamie! 
You know you want to rock the marmot
Remember that dramatic chipmunk video I posted the other day? Well, I’m pretty sure it’s not a chipmunk…I’ve heard rumors that it might be marmot (whatever the f that is).
Anyway, it took no time at all for the little guy to become a pop culture phenomenon! Busted Tees already spawned a “Dramatic Chipmunk” t-shirt and it’s available for pre-sale on the site. Buy it. Love it.
Thanks to Tahleen for the heads up.
Spice up your life
Everybody mark your calendars! The Spice Girls are set to announce their reunion plans on THURSDAY, JUNE 28TH! Reunion rumors have been floating for months now, but it looks like it’s finally going to happen.
Hey Scary, it’s time to start working off that baby weight. And speaking of babies, what the hell has Baby Spice been up to anyway? God, I’m excited for this.
Whose show is it, anyway?
According to Variety, another absurd name has been added to the list of possible Bob Barker replacements on “The Price Is Right” — Drew Carey! And worse yet, his chances look good. The story went on to say that Carey is already set to host a prime-time game-show on CBS, so he’s got a nice little relationship with the network already. The story also points out that he’s got that “blue collar appeal” and he can think quickly on his feet thanks to the time he spent hosting “Whose Line Is It Anyway?”
Pam’s past comes back to bite her in the ass — again!
When Pamela Anderson had her first baby, the world’s initial reaction was “Wow, it’s going to be real awkward when they grow up and find out their mother is a whore.” And, my friends, that day is finally here. Pam was on “The Today Show” this morning, talking to Matt Lauer about how her kids are dealing with her eccentric boobehs lifestyle. Among the topics discussed were Pam’s appearance in “Borat,” how she feels about turning 40 (her milestone birthday is July 1), and how her kids reacted to the *ahem* “infamous” sex tape between her and ex-husband Tommy Lee. Just when I start to think that Pam has matured — even slightly — over the years, she whips out answers like this:
We discussed a few things. I just kind of la la la-ed over the part about the videotape. … I told them, ‘Mommy and Daddy have videotaped each other.’ We [were] really in love and everyone is running around naked.’ They know us. It’s not like it’s anything new or shocking.
Hold up…did Pam just coin a new phrase? I think “la la la” might just be the new “yada yada.”
Feed for Big Spoon
