“Road,” released by Alice Cooper on Aug. 25, is the epitome of a rock album. Cooper, with his long black hair, intense eye black and who often wears a black studded top hat, has created an album that fully embodies every essence of himself. That being said, this is his 22nd solo album, and there is something to be said about someone who just keeps putting out music consistently since the 70s.
Cooper released this album after the singles “I’m Alice” and “Welcome to the Show,” which were featured at the top of the album. Both were released prior to the album and were the perfect taste of what was to come from the collection of songs.
Running at almost 48 minutes, the 13 new songs have brought back the same intensity as his previous work. Beginning with the titular song “I’m Alice,” one can’t help but feel a little amused at the way he portrays himself in the lyrics, calling himself “the master of madness, the sultan of surprise.” It feels as if the listener is at the beginning of a grunge magic show and Cooper is the magician about to perform his first trick. However, the trick in question might include a guillotine and a smog machine rather than pulling a rabbit out of his capacious hat.
Continuing on with “Welcome to the Show,” also put out prior to the release of the album, Cooper keeps the level of simple lyricism going, claiming that he is not a member of the human race. This song has an element of backup singers who are encouraging him, calling him “cool” and “all the rage.” If the first song was the intro to Cooper, for those who do not know him already, then this song is definitely the introduction to the album itself.
Track three, “All Over the World,” brings in a horn section and backup singers that very much feel out of place, making this song feel almost as if it has a funk groove rather than a rock one. At this point in the album, listeners realize that this album is simply Cooper talking about himself, his women, his travel, etc. Is it poorly written? Absolutely not, as the composition of the album is well-constructed and feels like it could have come out decades earlier and completely fit in with the music at that time. Then we get to the masterpiece titled “Big Boots.”
“Big Boots” sounds like a country song with a rock and roll composition. It tells the story of a waitress in a burger shop who has big boots, which one can only assume is a metaphor. That’s it, that’s the song. The song talks about her big boots, the chorus going, “She got big boots, baby got boots/she got big boots.” It is worth noting here that the term “big boots” is in this song 17 times and the word boots alone is in it 25 times. Though catchy, this song feels very misplaced on this album. The chorus is just ridiculous.
The eighth song on the album, “Rules of the Road,” is one of the best songs on the album, simply because of what the rules of the road actually are according to Cooper. “Rule number one, always get the money/ Rule number two, remember to always get the money/ And rule number three, never forget to remember to always get the money.” Followed by these additional rules: “If it is in a glass, drink it/ If it is offered to you, take it/ If you can drive it, drive it hard.”
This is the best-numbered list of items ever written in a rock and roll song, purely because of its ridiculous nature and is so in character of Cooper, therefore making this, arguably, the best song of the album.
Overall, Cooper’s 22nd solo album was interesting, incredibly theatrical and holds the attention of listeners as they are whipped through the different genres and messages of this album.
