1.Tim the Beaver, MIT-this is what our basketball team lost to in the first round of the NCAA Tournament, folks:
2.WuShock, Wichita State-Wikipedia describes this as “an anthropomorphic shock of wheat.” For once, I wish Wikipedia really was inaccurate as some teachers say it is.
3.UC Santa Cruz, the Banana Slugs-dating back to the days when this was just the nickname for the school’s intramural teams, the college understandably tried to change it when it entered the NCAA’s Division III in 1981. So help me, the students actually voted the decision down. Including the athletes.
4.Guilford College, the Quaker Man-because nothing strikes fear into the hearts of opponents like nonviolent, pacifist religious sects most people associate with oatmeal.
5.University of Oregon, Puddles the Duck-I don’t know what’s worse: the fact that Oregon’s famous Oregon Duck is actually named Puddles or the fact that he’s basically Donald Duck.